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This is What Happens When You Go to a Cannabis Sleep Party

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Recently I attended HMBLDT’s Night of Beauty Sleep at the Parachute Hotel in Venice, because it’s not every day you get invited to a party that’s all about sleeping and cannabis. If you’ve never been to Venice before it’s sort of like what would happen if the Dharma Initiative from Lost all had lots of money and got really into tapas. What was really interesting about this event is that it seemed elegant and targeted towards people in their 30s that wear crewneck sweaters and have multiple friends named Davyn. That’s certainly not a complaint considering the last cannabis event I dragged my friends to was at this bizarre “weed house” way too deep in the Hollywood Hills that felt like what would happen if Dan Bilzerian had 1/10th of his trust fund and was really into weed instead of prostitutes.

My friend Max and I arrived a few minutes early and, unfortunately, we were both coming from a full day of work as writers so we were dressed like toddlers going on a play date. There was a spread of healthy snacks and mood boosting chocolate, so I knew right away we weren’t going to be given any actual weed because no one has ever gotten super high and said, “Boy I could really go for some baby carrots right now!” Thankfully there was plenty of champagne, which is also known as the crewneck man’s hash pipe, so we were good to go.

The first thing we did was check out the hypnosis room. I realize that sounds like something out of Halloween Horror Nights, but it was really pleasant and refreshing. Morgan Yakus taught us how to get ourselves into a relaxed state of mind whenever we wanted. It’s a great way to fall asleep if you have trouble turning off your brain. I usually just turn on Dennis Leary’s stand up specials if I want my brain to turn off, but this is a much better option and doesn’t have a haircut like a Contemporary Christian Musician from 1994.

There was also a craft station where you could make your very own herbal dream pillow. What is an herbal dream pillow, you ask? It’s a pillow…full of herbs. If you want your event to smell like you’re being kissed by a rose, then having an herbal craft station is certainly the way to go. Again, I thought “herbal dream pillow” meant it would have some sort of weed element to it, but it was just rosemary, sage, and other names of Bookmobile drivers. Apparently they weren’t allowed to give out any marijuana-related products, which I understand, but also regretted because watching a group of attractive people that look like an LL Bean catalog super high and assembling scented pillows would’ve been incredible.

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My favorite moment of the evening was when a group of us were standing on the lovely balcony chatting, when I spotted a face I swore I recognized in the middle of the crowd. He was probably a foot taller than everyone around him and I was almost certain it was former NBA Champion and star of Eddie, John Salley. I consider myself quite knowledgeable about 90s NBA stars, but you never want to be the guy that says, “hey doesn’t that look like so and so?” Because if it’s not, let’s be honest, you look super racist. “Oh it’s a tall, black guy so you automatically assume it must be a famous basketball player? Real cool, Calvin Candie.” Thankfully it was actually him and my knowledge of 1992 Miami Heat roster has, once again, come in handy.

There was also a display for HMBLDT’s therapeutic remedies for sleep, pain relief, mood elevation, and anxiety that looked very interesting, but sadly we didn’t get to try them out. They provide an 8:1 THC-to CBD ratio formula to help with each ailment ranging from Sleep to Bliss, so it’s ideal for those that want to use cannabis in very specific ways.

Overall it was very pleasant event with no real complaints other than that I hate leaving a cannabis event not high whatsoever, but it’s good to see the industry moving into a more respectable, grown up style and getting rid of the stigma that only stoners in their parent’s basement use cannabis.

Be sure to check out HMBLDT’s products and, while you’re at it, you might as well make a little herbal pillow of your own.


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