Score yourself a second date by going into full-on reporter mode, a new study suggests.
After conducting several experiments, researchers from Harvard University concluded that asking a lot of questions about your date and showing genuine interest in their life is the best way to secure a Round 2.
Seems kind of like a no-brainer, but then again, most of us have experienced more than a couple terrible first dates with people who seem to view dating as a platform to talk only about themselves and their boring hobbies.
Researchers analyzed three speed-dating sessions in which 110 men and women had just four minutes to get to know each other. All the conversations were recorded, with researchers making note of how many questions were asked during each interaction. Researchers also noted how often participants asked follow-up questions, as well as how often those questions delved bellow the surface.
The daters were then asked which people they’d be interested in seeing again. Time and time again, participants were more likely to warm to potential partners who asked them lots of questions about themselves.
‘Lots’, in this context, rang it at around 15 total questions against the average of 10. That means those who asked roughly 15 questions were far more likely to get at least one more follow-up date.
“Speed daters who ask more follow-up questions... are more likely to elicit agreement for second dates,” wrote the researchers in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
“Despite the persistent and beneficial effects of asking questions, people do not anticipate that it increases interpersonal liking. They may be unsure about what to ask, or worry about being perceived as rude.”
In other words, try to ignore the anxious voice in your head for once, because it seems a little nosiness goes a long way.
h/t The Independent